kristin has been a bad kristin
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
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