my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
P.S. I can't hear my feet
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
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