can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
you never un-have a 4some
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
Randomize
