LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
