When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
At least life still wants to fuck me.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
Randomize
