Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
Randomize