I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
