your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
Randomize
