If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
