I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
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