So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
All I want is dick and wine.
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
Randomize
