you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
I licked your asshole in confidence.
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
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