I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Randomize
