so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
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