I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize
