remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Randomize
