And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
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