just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
Randomize
