Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
Randomize
