SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
