I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
he fucked my hip out of place.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Randomize
