Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
