We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
When did angry sex become our thing?
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Randomize
