Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
dude beer before liquor = i want to shoot myself in the face
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Randomize
