im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
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