Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
Randomize
