therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
I just accidentally handed the ticket lady a condom instead of the intended ticket. I am now the official whore of Harry Potter.
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Randomize
