it wasn't lemon gatorade
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize
