I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
Enjoy the penises
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
