My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
Randomize
