Me too!
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Randomize
