Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize
