i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
How does one acquire holy water?
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
Randomize
