Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Randomize