Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
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