porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
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