actually, I'm a sock model
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
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