I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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