need another drink. this is the easiest way
Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
