i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
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