I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
