It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
Randomize
