i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
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