I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
Public service announcement: if you would like to continue receiving blow jobs, a 25% increase in fuck-giving will be expected immediately, and you're expected to give an actual flying fuck at least once a week. Brought to you by the ad council.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
Randomize
