Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize
