are you still at the devil's house?
I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
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