Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
I just gargled with NyQuil
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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