i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
How do I know I'm high? Let me count the ways.
1. I put the milk in the cupboard, 2. Everything tastes fucking amazing, 3. My dog is really soft, 4. The lunesta butterfly flew out of my tv and touched me
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
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