You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Randomize
