Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize
